To My Old Life….And Maybe Yours Too
Life is a funny thing especially as of lately, but even when it’s funny it is its own little slice of heaven. I do not know about you but my year has been very interesting to say the least, not only interesting but just down right wild (all good things). One major thing that has been very noticeable this is the season of loss and gain. Simply, all in prayer, all in Gods perspective. All things that aren’t good things, are not always bad things either. Give me a moment to explain……
The thought of certain losses literally brought fear to my inner being. I can be honest, I need certain aspects in my life to properly function in this thing we call life. I need God, I need my village, I need certain living comforts, I just need things to be a certain way…… alright okay lets not lose focus. Often times we associate loss with grief, anger despair and any other thought that follows with sorrow. Often times loss is presented to us that way too. A double edged sword right? While learning to accept loss, I also learned that every loss isn’t all that bad. Shoot, some feel so good you almost forget how great life was before. I mean every loss isn’t a loss if you get my drift. I watched so many losses in the natural and physical aspects, some my own and some others. I seen so much deterioration in so many matters and affairs, I didn’t even know where to start. In the end I felt like I went through all stages of grief and it seemed like a continuous repeated cycle every few weeks. One thing after another, but the light at the end of the tunnel got brighter after every trail of grief. Now, the once dim light that now sits so bright is getting closer and closer to the hilltop that can’t be hidden (Matt. 5:14).
The light that can no longer be hidden is getting brighter by the day, as dead things fall away and new things are born (Thanks Myles), often are we reminded grief does have a happy ending. When you open yourself up to new perspective, being uncomfortable (if only temporary), and some true accountability. Lets just say it has its benefits, challenging moments but great benefits. Like them jobs that treat us like poo but got great benefits, you know what I mean. I am just saying we entertain what we choose too for how long we chose too. The one thing I’m trying to get too, is there some good benefits right here, that’s all. I get it letting go of certain parts of our lives is really scary sometimes, and can be even downright terrifying to many. Psshh……not everyone handles change well, so be mindful of how you handle them. Don’t be dumb, but be mindful. This includes the parts of you that have to change, extend yourself some grace too, with making changes in yourself. It’s alright, I’ve made plenty of mistakes too……..PLENTY! Oh, how we have come a mighty long way! We shall celebrate our little wins, BIG WINS and every win in this season. “ I know that’s right and neva eva wrong! ”, (Saweetie).
Now, that our old lives have faded away and we are made new, how shall we proceed forward in this new season of favor? What boundaries have been set? What changes have fully set in place? What are my triggers and how do I handle them when triggered to return to an old nature? I mean yes its a lot of questions but if I have ask them to myself, so do you. What often comes to mind for myself, as a sister/friend said, “ What is ahead of you? What you got going on now? Why are you focused on a temporary emotion when God has shown you what lies ahead and it’s much better! “, a ouch moment that was needed. Always make sure, the people you keep in your back pocket don’t mind checking you from time to time.
“To My old life…and maybe yours too,
I thank you for the moments I didn’t understand but taught me great lessons. I thank you for the changes even some that went left first and had to be redirected back right. I thank you for the renewed and restored peace, that has come now that confusion has exited. I thank you for the pruned/renewed village, that is filled with genuine LOVE. I thank you for the despair and shameful moments they gave me endurance beyond my comprehension (please, don’t forget to extend yourself grace in your growth). I thank you for the heartache even when only temporary, and maybe some permanent, it gave me courage to look beyond myself. Most definitely and one of the best lessons thank you for showing me everything is not about me. Lets not forget for always encouraging me to mind the business that pays me aka MINES! A kiss and an I love you to what was, and to what is ahead, I thank you for allowing my vulnerability to be your safe place. Thank you for allowing my heart to be filled beyond capacity, and my joy to be shown in my presence. Thank You for a NEW WALK, that can only come from ABOVE ”
Have a Good One. Be Safe. Vintage Magazine Loves You.